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Are you body smart?
by Staff
When it comes to your body, how much do you know? Test your knowledge with this quiz adapted from "YOU: The Owner's Manual", by Dr. Mehmet Oz and Dr. Michael Roizen.

Which of the following conditions is not primarily caused by deterioration of arteries?

  • Strokes
  • Wrinkles
  • Diabetes
  • Impotence

What's the best Valentine's Day gift you can give your partner to make him/her healthier?

  • A little real chocolate candy for its nutritional effects
  • Schedule a warm massage for loosening up muscles
  • Flowers, for their therapeutic and aromatic effects
  • I'll be more than happy to take a spin through the Victoria's Secret catalog to get a few ideas

Which of the following is true about the gender difference in brains?

  • Men tend to solve problems faster while women analyze complex issues better
  • Women have more emotional intelligence than men
  • Men's brains have a neural substation hiding under their Calvin Kleins
  • Men and women have the same brain system

What size particles are most hazardous to your lungs?

  • Size of the peanut, since it can block your windpipe
  • Size of a small piece of tabacco
  • Size of the stuff that causes smog
  • Size so small that you'd need more than the usual light-powered microscope to see them

Fill in the blank with the most appropriate comparsion. Sleep is like ____ .

  • Sex, because you can never get too much
  • Seat belts, because it helps your body come to a stop
  • Your boss, because it's most agreeable when it's uninterrupted
  • Church, because it's always so quiet and peaceful

What is excessive snoring the sign of?

  • That you stopped breathing
  • Imminent divorce
  • That there's some kind of obstruction in your throat
  • That you haven't had enough sleep

What's equivalent risk of an hour's exposure to secondhand smoke?

  • Smoking four cigarettes yourself
  • Driving without a seat belt
  • Sunning yourself for an hour without sunscreen
  • Having a cholesterol level of 240

Your intestines are most similar to what other organ?

  • Your heart, because in pumps nutrients through the body
  • The big one at the back of the church, because it makes all kinds of majestic sounds
  • Your brain, because it releases the same chemicals
  • You vocal cords, because they growl when you're hungry

Who is most likely to give you a stomach ulcer?

  • Your boss (from stress)
  • Your chef (from bad food)
  • Your spouse (from kissing)
  • Youself (from overeating)

What is the major function of the colon?

  • To signal your brain that you're full
  • To separate an independent clause from a dependent one
  • To suck fluid into your body
  • To digest food and get rid of gas

What is the reason that men can drink more alcohol that women?

  • Two words: Animal House
  • Men have more testosterone
  • Men are bigger physically
  • Men's blood gets less of what they consume

Where does conception take place?

  • Uterus
  • The Holiday Inn
  • Fallopian tubes
  • Cervix

Complete the following sentence. The size of a man's sex organ ________ .

  • Has got to make you wonder what Speedo was thinking
  • Doesn't matter
  • Is based on the need to attract members of the opposite sex
  • Is important for proper prostate function and sexual satisfaction

Which of these substances is most responsible for sex drive in both men and women?

  • Tequila
  • Estrogen
  • Testosterone
  • Nicotine

What is the best test to measure if you have the cardiovascular stamina to have sex?

  • Do ten push-ups without stopping
  • Practice by yourself
  • Climb two flights of stairs without stopping
  • Run on a treadmill for 10 minutes

What does a Pap smear detect?

  • Herpes
  • Nasty gossip from old friends
  • Cervical Cancer
  • Fertility

What foods increase fertility rates?

  • Walnuts
  • Oysters
  • Calcium-rich foods
  • Anything, as long as it includes flowers, a couple bottles of wine and a nice night of dancing

What are the most active muscles in the body?

  • The ones used in your back
  • The ones used around your jaw
  • The ones used around your eyes
  • The ones used during your honeymoon

Why should you avoid using Q-tips to clean your ears?

  • It breaks most of Emily Post's major rules about dinner table manners
  • Cleaning ear wax just increases the amount you produce
  • They can tear your eardrum
  • They can push the wax into position to block sound waves

What is an indication that you're legally blind?

  • You wear pink pants with a red shirt
  • Your loved ones accuse you of having no insight
  • You can't see the big letters on a vision chart from a distance of 20 feet
  • You can't read this, Mr. Magoo

What part of the body is least likely to be damaged by the sun?

  • Your eyes, because they're not skin
  • Your scalp, because it's covered by hair
  • Your butt, because it's covered by clothes (or hair)
  • The backs of your ears, because they're such a small area

What is the main purpose of skin?

  • To keep Hef in business
  • To hold hair follicles
  • To protect your insides from the outside world
  • To keep salt and potassium inside your cells

Which of the following is true about joints?

  • They're almost all constructed with just two bones and a hinge in between
  • They're illegal in at least 48 states
  • Most link bones with a hinge that is lubricated better when you eat fish oils or nuts
  • They're all composed of muscles, tendons, ligaments, cartilage, nerves and bones

Which of the following is true about your bones?

  • They're fully formed by the age 23
  • They're the hardest substance in your body
  • They have a matrix structure like the Eiffel Tower
  • They weaken in women, but not men

Which of the following is true about back pain?

  • It originates in your pelvic muscles
  • It gets more common as you get older
  • It's reduced by those weight belts often worn by people who exercise or work in warehouses
  • It can be largely prevented by doing exercise that centers around the pelvis and abdomen

What is the first line of defense against infection?

  • A sneeze or cough
  • The antibodies in your mouth and nose
  • Bathing with antibacterial soap
  • Your skin

What is the worst part about untreated, low-grade infections that don't have overt symptoms?

  • They can cause you to miss work
  • They can cause cancer of the pancreas
  • They can cause chronic inflammation in your arteries
  • They can make you resistant to antibiotics

What is the safest way to shorten the duration of the common cold?

  • Your mom's chicken soup
  • Zinc lozenges
  • Vitamin C and bed rest
  • Antibiotics

What is the best thing you can do to prevent infections?

  • Use a water filter
  • Use condoms
  • Wash your hands
  • Stop taking antibiotics as soon as the infection is gone

Which of the following is true about cancer?

  • It is almost never preventable
  • You cannot coexist with cancer
  • There are no cancers that are 100 percent lethal
  • Most cancers are contagious