Can We Guess Which MLB Team You Would Play For?

By: Zoe Samuel
Estimated Completion Time
4 min
Can We Guess Which MLB Team You Would Play For?
Image: Johnnyhetfield / E+ / Getty Images

About This Quiz

Baseball goes back a long way, but the major leagues only go back about a century. The National League, AKA the senior circuit, reaches back the furthest, to within the lifetime of Lip Pike, the very first professional ballplayer. The NL pitched itself as the family-friendly national pastime, populated with the best players in the country. 

The American League came along, backed by "less reputable" owners who made money in the liquor trade, even serving beer at games. This rivalry produced a contest between the two leagues dubbed The World Series. At first, we didn't get a World Series every year, but when we did, it was usually pretty electric, with the champions of each league competing to show that they were the best the world had to offer.

Since the founding of Major League Baseball, teams have carefully crafted their identities, using the teams of yesteryear as a guide. The Baltimore Orioles became the totally unremarkable New York Highlanders but were transformed by Jacob Rupert into The New York Yankees. The Brooklyn Bridegrooms switched leagues in 1889 and changed their name to The Brooklyn Dodgers. Teams with less money sometimes splurge on one marquee star to draw in fans, while some superstar teams are festooned with middling talents that somehow come together to win championships.

So which of the 30 MLB teams would suit you? Take this quiz and find out!

Which of these best describes your demeanor?
Happy go lucky
Wacky
Optimistic
Stoic
Where are you in your career?
I'm at a turning point.
I'm making another charge at the brass ring.
I'm starting over.
I'm near the peak.
Which of these statements about family do you most identify with?
They always end up someplace else.
They always have your back.
You have to keep your chin up, for their sake.
Family is who you choose to spend your time with.

Advertisement

How do you react to failure?
Shake it off and make some small changes.
Scream and tear at my clothes.
Shrug and try again.
Totally change my approach.
What precautions do you take when starting something new?
Change one key thing
Psyche myself up
Take some risks
Equip myself with the best of everything
What stands out about you, when you are among your peers?
I'm always seen as the new one.
I'm old school.
I'm the toughest one.
I'm the most polished.

Advertisement

How tight are you with your friends?
We see each other from time to time.
No one is tighter.
They see me through thick and thin.
Some of them are a bit fair weather if I'm honest.
How do you see your self-image?
Workmanlike
Proud
Scrappy
Storied
What strategy do you use to improve the odds in your endeavors?
Make a few clever choices and save energy
Go all in on a few big investments, from time to time
Swing for the fences when the opportunity comes
Invest in the best of everything ever time, every day

Advertisement

How should a person behave in victory?
Be humble.
Showboat like crazy.
Hug your friends.
Hold your head high, and say little.
How should people behave in defeat?
Vow to have another go.
Show your rage, so your supporters know you feel as badly as they do.
Shake your head and plan for the next run.
Say nothing.
Which of the following musical artists do you connect with as a person?
Willie Nelson
DJ Khaled
Billy Joel
Lady Gaga

Advertisement

What's your economic background?
Firmly middle class
Bluest blue collar
Professional class
Top 1%
With whom do you have a rivalry?
No one really
Everyone!
My older brother, who doesn't even know we have a rivalry
Someone a lot like me
How cool are you?
I'm cool, in my way.
I'm not cool at all.
I'm a little cool.
I'm as cool as ice.

Advertisement

How stressful is your life?
It's not stressful at all.
It's fairly high pressure.
It's stressful, but no more than average.
It's high stress, but high reward.
What drives you to work hard?
The nature of my job
I have a chip on my shoulder.
The expectations of my family
Personal pride
How do you feel about the Yankees?
Overpaid
Snobs
Bastards
Role models

Advertisement

How would your detractors describe your attitude?
Cheap
Obnoxious
Pollyanna
Snobby
What would you want for your walk-up music?
The Road to Escondido
All I Do Is Win
Miami 2017
Love Game
Which offensive strategy do you favor?
Grind out at bats
Power hitters in alternating order
Small ball
Wall to wall sluggers

Advertisement

What modern baseball innovation is most worth embracing?
WHIP
None
WAR
Exit velocity measurements
Which defensive strategy is best?
Put the ball in play, but keep it in the infield.
Don't bother. Just focus on offense.
Ignore base stealers, but focus on double plays.
Shift like crazy.
Which quality really defines a good pitcher?
Composure
Movement
Control
Velocity

Advertisement

Which shortstop would you want for your team?
Ozzie Smith
Ty Cobb
Young Jose Reyes
Nomar Garciaparra
Which starting pitcher would you want for your rotation?
Tom Seaver
Curt Schilling
Doc Gooden
Steve Carlton
Which of these would you try, if you got caught making a mistake?
Hidden ball trick
Accuse the other team of cheating
Double down on what I do well
Lash myself, and never do it again

Advertisement

What is the best quality possessed by veteran players?
Mentorship
Steadiness
Instincts
Knowledge of other players
Which is worth more, youth and energy, or age and guile?
Definitely youth and energy
Probably age and guile
Definitely age and guile
Probably youth and energy
Who was the best overall player of all time?
Trevor Hoffman
Mike Schmidt
Nolan Ryan
Sandy Koufax

Advertisement

You Got: