How Long Would You Survive in the Wild Wild West?

By: Brian Whitney

5 Min Quiz

About This Quiz

When you think about what it would be like to live in the Wild Wild West, it might sound like it could be something you could do, maybe even something that would be fun. I mean, we all know you look really cool in a cowboy hat, and perhaps you could even grow a super cool mustache.

You like horses, or at least you think that you do, and you're pretty sure you could ride one just fine. You think that chilling out in an old-time saloon might be kind of cool, and you're pretty sure you could fight off the bad guys if they came for you, and as far as Indians goes, you're pretty sure you would get along with them just fine.

So the whole thing would probably be a piece of cake for you, right? Well, you wouldn't be able to use your phone, because you know, there wouldn't be any phones, things might be a little rough when it came to soft beds or getting good gel for your hair which you are going to need because that cowboy hat is totally going to mess it up, and did we mention how dusty it would be? How would you do in the Wild, Wild West? Take this quiz and find out.

Where do you hang out?

Wine bars.

Sports bars.
Coffee shops.

Dive bars.

How would you cross a river in the woods?

I would just turn around.

Ride my horse.
Look for a narrow part.

Swim.

Do you burn easily?

Yes, but I use sunscreen.

Not really.
I burn like crazy.

Not at all.

Would you like to drive cattle?

It depends where they would like to go.

Sure, why not?
Not really.

How much does it pay?

You think someone is outside your house at night, how do you handle it?

Call the cops and look out the window.
Defend myself if I must.

Have you ever worked outside in the rain?

No, that seems dumb.

For a day or so.
For a little while.

Yes, I have done it lots.

How often do you need to do laundry?

Every few days.

Every week.
Every day.

Every few weeks.

Your power just went out, what do you do?

Complain a lot because I can't get Internet.

Take a walk.
Hide under my bed.

Read a book with a headlamp.

What do you do if someone tries to mug you?

Hand over my wallet.

Mug them instead.
Run!

Fight back.

Someone challenged you to a duel, what do you do?

Talk my way out of it.

Stare them down.
Run like crazy.

It's high noon.

Does hot weather bother you?

A little.

Not really.
Of course.

Not at all.

Rodeos are...

Boring.

Fun.
Dumb.

The best.

Are you good at building fires?

Nope.

I am okay.
I have never tried.

I build great fires.

How into cars are you?

Totally into them.

I like them fine.
I am into them.

I can't stand them.

You've been accused of stealing--what do you do?

Come forward and tell my side. Surely they'll be reasonable.

Someone's trying to frame me, and I'm gonna find out who.
Just lay low for a little while.

Time to skip town.

Who would you be in a mining town?

Manager of a general store.

Miner.
Innkeeper.

Prospector.

How social are you?

Kind of.

Not very.
Very social.

Not at all.

Which Clint Eastwood movie do you like best?

"Gran Torino"

"The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly"
"Dirty Harry"

"The Unforgiven"

Do you like camping?

Not really.

I love it.
Nope.

Kind of.

What would you do if a snake bit you?

That sounds like a perfectly good time to panic.

Treat the area and hope for the best. I'd be miles from a doctor.
Cuss it out and holler for help.

Drive myself to the doctor at top speed.

You ride into a town after a long journey. How long do you think you would stay before riding out?

Six months. Tops.

No more than a month.
Why would I leave? Seems like a nice place to settle.

Long enough to resupply and rest my horse -- a week at most.

How long do you think you could you survive in the woods with no equipment?

A couple nights should be no problem.

A month or two, I wager
Somewhere around a week.

I think I could last a couple weeks if I can avoid getting injured.

What do you think of handlebar mustaches?

I don't like them much.

I have one.
Ew. Soup has to get in it all the time.

Dust-covered five-o-clock shadow.

Do you look good in a cowboy hat?

Nope.

I look great.
Not really.

I look okay.

How well do you get along with horses?

I like them, but they don't like me.

We're pretty cool with one another. I think they just don't like being surprised.
They freak me out a little.

I love them. Just seeing one can put me in a good mood.

Have you read Louis L'Amour?

Who?

I have read a lot of his books.
No.

I have read some of his books.

Which of these actors do you like better?

Bruce Willis

Clint Eastwood
Pierce Brosnan

Tom Selleck

Do you have a favorite Quentin Tarantino movie?

"Reservoir Dogs" or "Pulp Fiction"

Am I supposed to know who that is?
"Kill Bill"

"The Hateful Eight"

What western archetype do you empathize with the most?

The Sheriff.

The outlaw.
The banker.

The bartender.

Are you an individualist?

I don't think so.

A little.
Not really.

Totally.

5 Minute Quiz 5 Min

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