Pretend to Make Some Drunken Office Party Decisions and We'll Give You a Karaoke Song to Sing!

By: Mark Lichtenstein

Are you going to finally ask out that hottie in the next cubicle?

How do you feel about photocopying your butt?

Party's at 5 but drinks arrived early. Martini at 2 p.m.?

You wanna puke, but the bathroom is far away. There's a potted plant nearby. Do you use it?

Time to tell the boss what you think of him! Yay or nay?

You hate your job. Do you just quit?

You've totally screwed up a spreadsheet and it's the last task you did before the holidays. Do you just quietly leave it as is?

The big presentation is tomorrow. Do you skip the party?

Will you take one for the road?

Are you wearing an offensive T-shirt?

How do you feel about simply not showing up to the party without telling anyone?

How do you feel about pulling a sickie so you can avoid the party and not be judged?

You're skipping the party. Do you post a cheeky selfie on social media, just to dice with danger?

It's hot in here! Time to open the window on your 30th-floor office... isn't it?

Do you tell your office Secret Santa that you got them?

Do you drunkenly flash the workmen on the scaffolding outside the office: after all, it's not like they have camera phones handy?

Your friend left their paycheck on their desk, face down. Do you look at it?

The boss is away and their parking spot is much better than yours. Do you "borrow" it?

You've been given a raise! Do you immediately buy presents for everyone?

You've been promoted! Do you immediately stop hanging out with your circle of friends at the party and instead hang with the execs?

There's a new dress code, and it says you must wear a jacket and tie or that you can also wear a knee length dress that does not show cleavage. It's going to get hot in the office during the party, as the weather is unseasonably warm. Do you encourage the men to wear dresses?

Do you volunteer to get the cake?

Someone brought in donuts. How many do you eat?

The morning of the party, they're selling bagels in the breakroom, on the honor system, to raise money for drinks that night. You have a $5. The bagels are $1. There isn't enough change. Do you sneak a bagel?

Jill in accounting is raising money for her kids' school by selling raffle tickets. Top prize is a freakin' boat! How many tickets do you buy?

Your really devout colleague is talking about her religion again. Do you tell her you're a Satanist, just to annoy her?

Everyone is being laid off. Do you cry in the office or wait until you get outside?

Everyone is being laid off.... except you! Do you gloat?

A meeting overran into party time and Jack the bro keeps interrupting all the women, making it even longer. What do you do?

You're so, so sleepy and it's only 2:00 p.m. No one will be in the supply room before 4:00 p.m. The party is at 6:00 p.m. and you want to rock out hard. Do you take a nap inside of the closet?

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About This Quiz

The office party is a minefield. Whatever you do will have consequences at work: you could make your colleagues hate you, you could end up in an awkward breakfast with a co-worker. Worst of all, you could wind up on YouTube, singing Abba for all eternity.

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