Should You Buy the Apple Watch?

By: Mark Philip Lichtenstein
Estimated Completion Time
5 min
Should You Buy the Apple Watch?
Image: Shutterstock

About This Quiz

The Apple Watch is the coolest geekiest accessory in the world. Sure, "Star Trek" had the flip phone, and "Star Trek: The Next Generation" had Bluetooth, but James Bond had the smart watch, and he trumps everything. Strap on your taste and wind up your credit score. It's time to find out if you can afford not to have an Apple watch.
How brand loyal are you?
Totally. If Apple made a screwdriver, I'd buy it.
If the product is good.
Not really.
Brands are pointless.

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Do you own a lot of gadgets?
Tons of them.
Some. I sell the old ones.
No, just a few.
A gadget is by definition a pointless thing. I don't go in for that sort of thing.

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What smartphone do you use?
The iPhone 7.
The iPhone 6.
The iPhone SE.
A Google Pixel.

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Does your car have Apple Carplay?
Yeah! It's awesome.
No, but my Zipcar does, sometimes.
I don't really know. I just use the radio.
Who cares? I paid for satellite navigation in the car so I wouldn't have to fiddle with my phone while driving.

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When you hear the word "Apple" what comes to mind?
Genius
Design
Corporate
Rip-off

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Steve Jobs is__________.
Jesus
Amazing
A legend
Dead

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Tim Cook is __________.
A worthy successor
A wily businessman
A sad shadow of Steve Jobs
Lucky he still has his job

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What watch do you own right now?
I don't own a watch. I've been saving up for my Apple Watch since 1996!
A G-Shock
A tough-as-nails Maratac
A Longines

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What is the purpose of a wristwatch?
Jewelry
It says something about your personality.
To tell time
To tell time while your hands are on the controls of an aircraft

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What says "class"?
Exclusive, sleek, expensive electronics
The highest of high tech
Restraint
Not having to be asked that question

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If your watch could do one thing aside from telling time, what would that be?
Show me my texts
Show me satnav directions
Tell me the date
Be waterproof

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Do you have any smart home accessories?
Even my coffee grinder is smart.
I have an Echo.
No. I don't feel they are necessary.
No. I don't like the idea of Apple, Amazon, and Google sitting in my living room, recording everything I say or do.

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If you could make one more object "smart", what would it be?
My dog's collar
My socks
My pen
My old computer

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If you had to get a watch other than a smartwatch, what would it be?
Does Apple make a regular watch?
One of those Casio watches with a calculator
A Marathon watch. Those things are tough, and cool.
My... current... watch...?

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Do you respect airplane mode when you fly?
No. It's stupid.
Not really. It's kind of a pain.
Why would I not? I'm not making calls from a plane.
If you don't respect the orders of the flight crew, it's a crime.

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Do you look at your phone during movies in the theater?
Sure! I gotta answer my texts, right?
Discreetly. I hope no one notices.
Only during the trailers.
No, because I'm not a monster.

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Do you have an Instagram account?
Of course! Check me out on the 'gram!
For work.
I do, but I never put anything up there.
No, because I am an adult.

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Do you use Snapchat?
Of course! All my friends are on Snapchat!
Sometimes. I'm more of a fan of Signal.
No, I just text.
What is Snapchat?

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Do you ever go on BillyBingBing?
Uhhh, yeah! Of course I do! That's the new one that's taking over for Snapchat right?
No. Sounds interesting. I'll check the app store.
No. God, these names just get sillier and sillier.
You just made that one up didn't you?

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If you could just strap a stack of money to your wrist, would you?
If I could put an Apple logo on it.
Literally? Well, maybe if everyone else was doing it.
No. That's idiotic.
No. Just... no.

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Can you name one app on the Apple Watch?
Mount Burnmore
Outlook, by Microsoft!
The...time?
What's an app?

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What does the "i" in Apple products stand for?
Intelligent
Intelligence
Insipid
Internet. It stands for Internet. It always has, and always will. The iMac was the first Mac that could go online. End of story.

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Is it the Apple Watch or the iWatch?
The new one is going to be called the iWatch, I hear.
The Apple Watch.
I don't know.
I don't care.

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If you weren't buying the Apple Watch, what would you spend the money on?
The next iPhone
Tickets to a Broadway show
A Sector watch
I'd put it in savings.

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What is the limit on your credit card?
$1,000
$3,500 per card. I have great credit.
I don't use credit cards. They're a trap.
I have an AmEx card. There is no limit, and it's not a credit card.

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Did you own the iPhone 2?
Yeah! I loved it.
I got the iPhone 4 for my first smartphone.
I don't remember that one.
There was no iPhone 2. There was the iPhone, the iPhone 3G, then the 3Gs, the 4, the 4s, the 5, and so on. The 4 came out when every other manufacturer was putting out 4G phones, but Apple only owned 3G chipsets, but they named their phone the 4, which I suspect was to make customers thinks it was 4G. Not very nice business practices.

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Assuming you get the Apple Watch, would you show it off to people, or just wear it without drawing attention to it?
Why else would I buy it! Look at me!
If someone asks, I'll talk their ear off.
If someone insisted, I'd talk about it.
I'd hide it as far up my sleeve as possible.

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Do you mind if the conditions in Apple factories aren't very nice?
Nope. Gimme the toys.
A bit, but aren't they just as bad elsewhere?
Yes, but the system is so opaque, it's hard to find out which factories treat their workers like human beings.
Yes, but HP and Samsung often use the same facilities, depending on the products. It's pretty tough to avoid this moral quandary.

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Why do you buy gadgets?
I must have the precious!
They're so cool!
It solves a need.
Gadgets are, by definition, pointless toys. Forget it.

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What is the difference between a gadget and a tool?
There is no difference.
I suppose a gadget becomes a tool when you use it.
The terms have a lot of overlap depending on circumstances.
A gadget is a toy. A tool is a useful device.

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