What Car Are You Meant to Drive?

By: Zoe Samuel
Estimated Completion Time
3 min
What Car Are You Meant to Drive?
Image: Shutterstock

About This Quiz

These days, there are all kinds of cars for all kinds of drivers. There are cars that are good offroad, that carry lots of equipment and can bully their way through just about any scenario short of a full-on zombie apolcalypse. There are cars that are sleek, elegant and tasteful, perfect for the understated, affluent up-and-comer who wants to make the right kind of first impression. There are cars that are very practical, ordinary and efficient, which can carry around a little nuclear family plus some suitcases and the dog, that are ideal for those whose future lies in the 'burbs.

Choosing a car is a combination of budget, temperament, specifications and lifestyle. It's further imbued by advertising, society and your own personality with an awful lot of additional meaning. You car isn't just a fancy-pants horse that gets you from A to B without getting rained on. It's also a comment that you make to the world about the sort of person you are; flashy, sensible, wealthy, reckless, etc. That means you need to search through all the cars that are out there, and find one that's the perfect match. Perhaps if you take this quiz, we can help you get a little closer to that goal!

Who do you want to impress?
Everyone! Or no one, I don't mind.
Nobody
Bros
My enemies
How practical are you?
Not a bit, I'm too rich for that sort of thing.
Immensely
I hate practicality!
I have my moments of practicality.
Do you like annoying people?
Not really, though I'm good at it.
Of course not.
It's my very favorite.
No, though I'm OK with doing it if I must.

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Do you want to spend a lot of money?
Not a lot; an obscene amount.
Nope
Yep
I want to spend enough money, and no more.
Are you up-and-coming?
I've upped and come, baby.
Yes
I think so.
No
Does your car have to be highly unique?
In its way, yes.
Nope
Not really
Absolutely!

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Do you like leather seats?
Love them.
Hate them.
I actually need them.
I prefer fabric.
Do you secretly wish your car could fly?
It feels like it can.
Kinda
No, I want to drive really fast instead.
It can!
Do you like endangering your own life?
Not really
No
Yes, among others.
Only for a good reason.

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How important is comfort?
It's the most important.
Very important
Secondary
Not at all important.
Can you physically get in and out of a low-slung car?
LOL, maybe 20 years ago.
Yes, but I don't want to.
Not comfortably, since no one can, but it won't stop me.
If I had to.
Who do you want for an enemy?
James Bond
Hippies
Everyone
The Child-Catcher

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Do you intend to decorate your car?
It's already decorated.
No
Yes, with spinning rims!
Yes, with all sorts of fins and extra funny things.
Do you like a loud engine?
No, I like a low electric purr.
I prefer quiet.
I love it so much.
I don't mind.
How much horsepower is enough?
If you have to ask, you can't afford it.
Enough is enough.
All of it and then a bit more.
I don't count power that way.

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Do you care about luxury trim?
Naturally, darling.
Nope
Yes, more than is healthy.
I care about interesting trim.
Do you mind about brand recognition?
I want people to not be sure, then realize, and assume I live in a hollowed-out volcano.
I don't care.
Branding is everything, baby!
I prefer no brand.
What kind of movie would your car be in?
Something black and white, starring Helen Mirren.
Something starring Adam Sandler.
Something starring Vin Diesel.
Something starring Gene Kelly.

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What job will people think you have when they see your car?
Hedge fund billionaire
Accountant
Hotshot rapper
Explorer
What job do you actually have?
Gentleman of leisure
Associate lawyer
Import and export, so to speak...
Professional clown
Will you buy the car for cash?
Yes, though not literally.
I wish!
Yes, literal cash.
I will win it in a hand of cards.

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Will you crash the car?
My driver might, but I doubt it.
Never
Probably
Only if being chased by villains.
Will you drive the car every day?
I will be driven in the car.
Yes
Most days, but not every day.
No
How much does fuel efficiency matter?
Not a bit, my car is electric.
A lot
I actively dislike it.
Quite a lot

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How safe should your car be?
It should be the safest place to be in a national crisis.
Good in a crash.
Not at all.
I don't mind.
How many people will be going in the car?
Just me and my driver, Phillips, who is a retired Navy SEAL.
Me, my boo, our kids, and the dogs.
Me and my various side pieces.
Our family plus various people we meet along the way.
Do you plan to park it on the street?
LOL no, it'd never fit.
Sure
No, people would rob it.
Probably not, we have a driveway.

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Who would steal your car?
Nobody would dare.
Someone really desperate.
Professional rivals
Someone on a mission.
Who will envy your car?
Everyone with taste.
People with no car.
Men under the age of 25.
People whose inner artist is slowly dying.
How long will you own your car?
Forever
15 years
A year
10 years, then it will go to a museum.

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