What's Your 1789 Name?

By: Emily Maggrett
Image: lisegagne / E+ / Getty Images

About This Quiz

They say that if you can make it in New York City, you can make it anywhere, but what about New York City in 1789? 

Life back then was hard: homes lacked indoor plumbing and were insufficiently heated, bathing was a luxury and most people had to work from dawn until dusk. As if that weren't enough, many Western countries were in a state of extreme upheaval, as the United States strove to elect its first president and Congress, Brazil fought for independence from Portugal and the French Revolution commenced. However, things weren't all bad: Antoine Lavoisier penned the first chemistry textbook, Elijah Craig had just invented bourbon and Mozart was writing old-timey bangers!

If you've ever wondered about how you'd fare if you lived in those times, this quiz is for you. We're going to ask you how you'd deal with classic 1789 situations like having to grow your own food, being expected to always do your duty and having an unrequited crush on Ben Franklin. Using your answers, we'll calculate what your flowery, old-fashioned 1789 name would have been and share  a few juicy secrets about your personality in the bargain!

So, are you excited to travel back to a time without micro-influencers or sick beats? Put down your smartphone, fire up your time machine and come play this quiz!

In 1789, colonial Americans had just waged the Revolutionary War. Had you been alive, what would your colonial job have been?

What's your favorite old-timey food?

Let's say you had to ride a horse to get around. What kind of horse would you have?

In your opinion, which of these modern conveniences is the most overrated?

The French Revolution took place in 1789. If you had been there, what part would you have played?

Do you believe in parental fealty? Aka, how often do you call your mom?

If movies, TV and video games disappeared tomorrow, how would you cope?

Embroidered handkerchiefs: cute or nah?

Do you have a green thumb or are you a famous plant killer?

Some of the greatest US cities were founded in the 1600s and 1700s. You have the opportunity to see what one of them was like in 1789. Which one do you choose?

How do you feel about traditional gender roles?

Are you neat?

What kind of 1700s residence would you dwell in?

Do you enjoy going to the farmer's market?

If the patriarch of your family barred you from marrying your true love because they were from a lower class than yours, would you heed him?

Can you charm your way out of anything?

What's your ideal 1789 Valentine's Day date?

Conditions were rough in 1789 (limited heat, no bathrooms, lots of diseases). Are you one of those tough people who could win "Survivor" or are you more of a hothouse flower?

Of all these old-timey outfits, which one would you actually wear?

Your impoverished brother Maurice, his wife Martha and their ten children ask if they can live in your homestead. Do you agree?

What's closest to your natural hair color and texture?

People in the 1700s loved talking about "doing their duty." Do you like doing YOUR duty?

For once, you have a free moment. Which 18th century pastime will you now enjoy?

A local swain is sending you romantic letters. Do you embark upon a risqué correspondence?

The British are coming! What's your next move?

Be honest: as a 1700s person, would you defy society or obey its conventions?

Who's your favorite 18th century author?

In your opinion, is Ben Franklin bae?

A genie appears and offers to grant your greatest ambition. What is it?

Time for an old-timey dessert! Which one will you have?

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