Which Ancient Civilization Are You?

By: Mark Lichtenstein
Estimated Completion Time
3 min
Which Ancient Civilization Are You?
Image: Shutterstock

About This Quiz

While our modern culture takes plenty of studying just to understand what's going on in our daily lives, it's also important to know about where we came from, so that we can figure out where we're trying to go. Still, not all of the great civilizations of history are well known to people today, and of those that are, there are misconceptions and myths about them that often aren't very accurate.

Every continent has enjoyed a great civilization in ancient times, with the Americas sporting the Olmec, Aztec, Maya, and Inca; the British, Greeks, and Romans of Europe; the Assyrians, Byzantines, Persians (and many more) of the Middle East; the Mongols, Japanese, and Chinese empires of the Far East, the Mughal Empire of South Asia; and the Ethiopian, Songhai, and Luba Empires of Africa. All of them had their own characters, and all contributed in their own way to the cultures that have come after them.

Whether you're insular or extroverted, progressive or conservative, hierarchical or egalitarian, rural or urban in your mindset, a sophisticated thinker or someone who prefers the simpler things in life, there's an ancient empire that has something to teach you. So let's find out which one it is!

How much war do you like around you?
One really good one every once in a while
Big wars every generation or so
All war, all the time
Small wars, frequently
How powerful do you like your civilization?
Very powerful
Shockingly powerful
Powerful in one specific way
Not powerful
What food do you want to eat?
Fish
Chicken
Sheep
Hummus

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What domestic enemy do you want to fight?
My own people
The Mongols
All of Europe and some of Asia
The Romans, the Greeks, The Persians, the Egyptians, the Babylonians
What clothing do you want to wear?
Exquisitely crafted, loose fitting clothes
Yellow silk
Pelts
Togas
What religion would you like to see around you (whether or not you personally practice it)?
Zen Buddhism
Buddhism
Norse Paganism
Zoroastrianism, Judaism, Christianity, and loads and loads of cults

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How powerful do you want the women to be?
Just a bit less powerful than their male counterparts
Not powerful at all
Just as powerful as men, if they can prove it
Not usually powerful, but usually with total power within the house
What sort of weapon might you fight with?
A longbow
A halberd
An axe
A short sword
What will your house be made of?
White oak
Red oak
Stone
Clay

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What feature might the chairs in your room have?
They wouldn't exist
They would have ornate carvings of dragons on them
They would have crude carvings of wolves on them
They would have short backs
How will you get enough water?
Rain
Well
River
Irrigation
What holiday will you invent?
The Emperor's Birthday
New Year's Eve
Yule
Pesach

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Where might your descendants end up?
America
Tibet
Istanbul
The south of France
What tragedy will strike your civilization?
Nuclear war
SARS
Mass starvation
Wars without end
How far back in time do you consider ancient?
1600s
1000s
900s
BCs

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Who will be your civilization's external enemy?
China
Mongolia
Essex
Rome
What sort of meat will there be?
Expensive beef
Chicken, eels, dogs, you name it
Sheep and fish
Birds, lambs, goats, oxen, horses
What sort of cutlery will you use?
Specialty knives, but only for preparing food. Chopsticks and spoons, otherwise
Knives and forks for cooking, chopsticks and hands for eating
Knives and hands
Wooden cutlery, and hands

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How will you greet each other?
Usually a curt bow, sometimes a deep bow
Either a curt bow, or total prostration
Say "Heil ok sæll."
The same way we say goodbye
Will there ever be a moment of peace?
There will be a long period of piece, but kept only by the constant threat of death
There will be periods of peace
Not until the Renaissance
Never
What book will your deeds be recorded in?
Many scholarly books, some from the period, some written later
The Spring and Autumn Annals
Books written by archeologists
Religious texts taken as history

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What will the weather be like?
Raining all the time
Pretty nice, but depending on what part of the country you live in
Cold and beautiful
Hot but beautiful
What sea will you sail across?
The Sea of Japan
The Indian Ocean
The North Sea
The Mediterranean
Who will be your absolute worst ruler?
Emperor Hirohito
Yang Guang
Olaf Tryggvason
Nero

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What other ancient civilization will you trade with?
China
India
Gaul
Carthage
What other ancient civilization will you conquer - at least try to conquer?
Korea
The Stans
England
None
What animal will you prize as special?
Dogs
Birds
Fish
Camels

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What will your dragons look like?
Lithe, long, and fierce
Funny, friendly, and long
Fat, angry, and evil
They won't be depicted with images
What animal will you see as sacred?
Monkeys
White Tigers
Boars
Bulls
How will you write down your epics?
Write them vertically on parchment
Using 6,000 characters
Write them horizontally on skins
Carve them into tablets

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You Got: