Which Famous World Leader Are You?

By: Zoe Samuel
Estimated Completion Time
7 min
Which Famous World Leader Are You?
Image: n/a

About This Quiz

There are over 190 countries in the world, and each one is led by someone with their own distinct style. Take this quiz to find out which world leader most suits you.
What's your signature style?
Leather pants and kitten heels. Rowrrrrr.
I rock a badass headdress.
A sensible suit.
A suit cut with microscopic precision.
In which part of the world do you consider your leadership most influential?
The Commonwealth.
Africa.
Europe.
North America.
Putin: yay or nay?
I'm not afraid of him.
I honestly have very little time to think about him.
I will nay him into oblivion.
F*** that guy.

Advertisement

Democracy is...
Annoyingly likely to produce the wrong result, but probably going to work for me for the next few years at least.
Absolutely necessary for the prosperity of society.
Endangered, but I'm fighting for it.
A great way to get ahead in the age of TV, because a pretty smile can fool nearly anyone.
Is the European Union a good or bad idea?
Great idea, but don't let anyone hear me saying that in public just now.
So good we've got one of our own now.
The best idea ever. How else will my people know not to invade everyone?
Good, but they really should do more with it.
What would be an achievement you're proud of?
I was the last one standing when everyone else in my government fell to pieces.
I brought freedom of the press to my country.
I piloted our economy through tough times.
I have the most representative cabinet in our country's history.

Advertisement

What are three major issues your country suffers from?
Ignorance, slow growth, damaged relationships with neighbors.
Poverty, disease, regional instability.
Russia, immigration, silly neighbors.
Weak economic growth, trade, carbon pricing.
What neighboring or nearby country is most annoying?
France.
I only get to pick one?
France again.
Russia.
How has misogyny affected your career?
Funnily enough, it has been surprisingly limited in scope.
Misogyny is one of the millstones around the neck of my country.
I have somehow managed to plough right through it.
I try to neutralize it in any way I can, but I know it benefits me.

Advertisement

Do people think you're physically attractive?
I really don't care.
What a ridiculous question.
I once dressed up nicely and the entire world flipped out.
Eminently. My bubble butt can lead the hordes of Twitter like the Pied Piper with the rats.
What one law would you like to make?
Repeal the Salisbury Convention.
No more unsustainable borrowing.
Bring back TTIP.
Get those pesky carbon prices sorted out.
What is something about your country that you're proud of?
Our health system, which we love love love!
We are a beacon of hope and progress.
We haven't invaded anyone for literally ages.
Our healthcare system.

Advertisement

How did you win office?
Everyone else fell to pieces and there I was, ready to lead.
Hard-fought elections.
By consistently delivering on my promises.
Name recognition, famous family, smiling a lot, and having good policies (I think).
What's your position on nepotism?
It's endemic to my country even if I haven't used it.
It's a real problem in my country.
Kill it with fire.
I am for it.
The environment. Big deal, biggest deal, or no deal?
Big deal, even if we have a lot of NIMBY bullshit to get around.
Monster deal. Failure to act will hit us hardest and first.
We're making a lot of progress but we don't brag about it.
Giant deal.

Advertisement

What do you make of that orange fella they've got in America?
I wrapped that idiot around my little finger.
I very much doubt he could find my country on a map.
Screw that guy.
It's sort of like living with a very big toddler.
What do you wish people knew about your country?
We're a great place to do business, and trying harder to become even better. Plus you can call Tokyo and Los Angeles in the same day without coming in early, staying late, or learning another language (because they all know ours). Who else has that going for them?
We are actually doing pretty well and taking care of ourselves. We're not just some pathetic basketcase.
We really do have a sense of humor.
We're not just a slightly less-than version of our neighbor.
What's the biggest issue the world is facing?
The hollowing out of the center and of the middle class.
Poverty, disease, weak government, failure to prosper, and climate change. I have a lot to deal with.
The rise of populism.
The failure of modern government to keep opprtunity growing for anyone willing to work for it, and to keep a lid on rising inequality.

Advertisement

What one thing in your country is particularly useful to you right now?
Jeremy Corbyn is a complete idiot.
I am very popular and foreign leaders love me.
I am by far the most competent person in it.
Our neighbor just elected a complete baboon and I look like a sexy Einstein in comparison, no matter what I do.
What country would you most like to colonize, and why?
We're done with all that, thanks.
America, just to see how they like it.
Austria. I just have the feeling they'd vote for me. But don't tell anyone.
Not a whole country, but I'm into the idea of adding Alaska.
Where do you see your country in 50 years?
God willing, part of the EU. Just, shhh.
Taking its rightful place among the nations.
Still a keystone in the great arch of progress.
Doing what we're doing, only more so and better.

Advertisement

What's the worst thing your country ever did?
So this one time, we had an empire...
We started out strong but we had some very regrettable civil wars. We need to stop doing that.
Some major genocide and a few wars you might've heard of.
I'd tell you ask the First Nations people, but it's surprisingly hard to find any, for reasons that the surviving folks will tell you.
What ideology would you pick?
Enlightened conservativism, of a type the American right would consider borderline communism.
Progressive democracy.
Christian democracy.
Social democracy.
What, if any, is the proper role of religion in politics?
What a vulgar question.
I'm personally religious, but separation of church and state are a fine thing.
Religion is for children.
It should inform one's personal faith, which may impact one's decisions, but that's it.

Advertisement

The United Nations is...
Just a talking shop these days. NATO is where the real power is.
A great idea. My nation has been supporting such things for a century.
A very good idea, except it does rather involve sitting down with a lot of real assholes.
In need of more support from all of us.
Tell us something most people don't know about you.
I love to cook and often make pasta from scratch.
I'm an honorary member of the Links, the powerful African-American society.
I'm a great bartender and I have a degree in quantum chemistry. I can literally do it all.
I have a tattoo on my shoulder of planet Earth surrounded by a Haida raven.
Who is your role model?
Margaret Thatcher, naturally.
Gotta be Maggie again.
I am my own role model.
My daddy.

Advertisement

What's your number one qualification for your job?
Understanding of finance plus years of experience in government departments from housing to education to home affairs.
More degrees than a compass, strong international relationships, and a will of steel.
When our country was still half run by dictatorship, I refused to collaborate. You don't have to like my principles, but you have to admit I stick to them. Plus I have had lots of different jobs and know what it is to come back from failure.
I really know government, partly because it is the family business. I'm very smart and foreign nations love me.
What would your worst critic say is your weakness?
My dishonesty.
My vagina.
My seeming lack of emotion.
My hubris.
What would that same critic reluctantly admit is your great strength?
I'm organized, I'm ruthless, I get shit done, and my opposition is in total disarray.
I'm incredibly educated, I'm well-connected in ways that value the country, and the people adore me.
I'm organized, I know every nut and bolt in government, and our enemies fear me.
I'm eloquent, I know my topic, and the international community loves me so much that it actually benefits the country. Plus, I'm hot.

Advertisement

You Got: